Not hopeless for this generation

Yeah I am from this generation, going 20 in a little while :D. And I was pretty hopeless for it. (Nah I am not any better, I haven’t done anything with my life yet. But….I have plans! xD)

But check out this challenge with young people spreading important messages on mental-health and fighting stigma: The I’m Not My Project  . They write articles and do creative work and much more 🙂

Here’s the 17 year old behind this project:

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Distress Campus

(Update: This was written 5 months ago! This isn’t my current state. Just saying!)

I feel hurt. I am hurting, just getting it here. F*ck, where do I start? I wish I could feel my way through all these feelings. My feelings are bull. I wanted to art-ify my writing here..but really? Not feeling it. Yeah. What gives, mind?

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At the Therapist

I was at the therapist. This therapist is so good. She didn’t even start….therap-izing me yet but she is already good for me. I felt so calm and understood after our session. She let me go on on my own pace, I didn’t feel as scared with her like I did with the other therapist. I was comfortable enough to share some pretty vulnerable sides of me. Cried so, so so so so so f*cking much in that room. And it was good, the first “actual” therapist. She charges a lot for half an hour but good help is hard to find so I will stick with her. First therapist I actually looked forward to visiting again.

I don’t Know Anymore

I used to gush about all this creativity I had in me. Nowadays, I feel a little like that. But I don’t have that natural flow in my writing anymore. I didn’t used to need my special set of word-prompts to prompt my posts.

“Do I have nothing else to write about?” I posit myself. Under certain perspectives (Mommy and Mental Doctor!), I am wasting time online. There’s some nuance to get the right words in a post. Or are the problems occurring because I am getting better? Better at writing? Could be.

I wonder about the longevity of my blog though. Will I keep it up? Heck, could I even make money off of this crap? We shall see. We see shall. Nope, didn’t work Yoda-ishly  well; work didn’t Yoda-ishly well, nope. I am the cooliest.

Magenta Roses by Lila’s Musings

Need for Writing

Soliciting this page to come up with awesome writing. Gawsh! Mom is away now and I had time to recover mentally. I just burped. The EFT method is rad. It’s helpful. I just did it now like I did last night. It’s one of the amazeballs of relaxation techniques. Amazeballs. Amaze….balls.

Balls.

I’ve been greatly vacillating from, “Imma study!” to “Imma sick!”.

Yep. It will be a while until I tip over OCD, kicking up the past hurt and otha sh*t.

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Otha sh*t.

Not funny.